Sunday, June 23, 2013

Movie Review: Boxer's Omen

The Boxer’s Omen (1983, Chih-Hung Kuei) - 9.0
In a kickboxing match, the huge guy from Bloodsport injures his opponent, so that guy’s brother goes to Thailand to get revenge, and instead is called by a dead monk-wizard who used to be related to him in another life, and also has some vengeance issues that this guy has to work out for him (he’d do it himself but he’s dead). So the guy trains to become a monk-wizard and this leads to insane monk-wizard battles and some equally insane battle preparations. This movie includes adorable stop-motion bat skeletons, vomit-eating, eye-piercings, crocodile fetuses, planting a human corpse inside of a crododile corpse to create a maggot-covered sorceress, worms, tarantulas, a flying head with strangulation tentacles, eating regurgitated chicken anus and banana peels, the sorceress giving birth to a gooey blue puddle that saran-wrapped mummies grow out of, blood, entrails, brutal kickboxing, things that glow with neon, and every monstrous creation and imaginative special effect that could ever be possible. It’s fairly non-stop, constantly out-doing itself, and is one of the craziest fucking movies I’ve ever seen. This movie’s existence makes all life on Earth more valuable.

08/20/11: 35mm

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